Dirtbag Writer

Dirtbag Motels, Roaches, and Other Gnarly Stuff

Posted on 14. Apr, 2010 by Writer in On The Road

I was extremely weary after a long day of driving and sightseeing in the desert and found myself in Tonopah, Nevada – still six-hours away from my home in Salt Lake City.  I found a parking spot in town to crash in back of Roo.  It was only 7pm, but I was wiped.  I tried to sleep but I just didn’t feel safe.  The parking lot said free parking for truckers and RVs but I felt totally sketched.

I got back into the driver seat to look for a better option.  I thought about continuing on and finding some place to crash along the way but I was just too damn tired and then I saw a sign for an Economy Inn.

The View Outside My Motel Room - Tonopah, NV

I asked to see the room and it looked alright so I paid in cash – $30.  The room I had been given a key for looked nothing like the room I had been shown.  The deadbolt didn’t lock and the windows opened from the outside.  I checked under the bed for dead hookers and took a quick shower while scenes from Psycho played through my head.  Footsteps outside my room at 3am made my heart rate soar and I was out of there by 5:30.

I would have been better off crashing in my car.

Not to long ago I left my comfortable existence for a magazine internship in super expensive Colorado mountain town.  To save money, I planned on dirtbagging it and camping as long as I could manage.  After only a few nights, rain, lightening, and marble sized hail balls chased me inside and into the Glenwood Springs Hostel.

The Lazy Lizard Hostel - Moab, UT

Why are hostels so damn creepy in the US, but so freaking cool everywhere else?  Is it because I am usually too enamored with the fact that I am in a foreign country and oblivious to comfort and basic hygiene?  Rather I was thinking about my cozy bed a mere six-hour drive away and wondering what the hell I had been thinking to give up all that.

“Oh dude what is that?” I listened as the hostel employees tried to identify the matchbox car sized bug that made its way across the carpet before I crawled into bed with the hostel supplied linens (you weren’t allowed to use your own sleeping bag or blankets for fear of bed bugs, lice, and the like).  I began to itch as I drifted off to sleep as the transient in the bunk next to mine mumbled about the devil and fought out loud with the demons in her mind.

Why hadn’t I just spent one more night in the car?

Speaking of matchbox car sized bugs; last night as I tried to fall asleep I heard some strange sounds coming from Frank’s cage.  She’s been super high energy lately so I thought maybe she was just being her annoying self and playing in her food.  I turned on the light and saw her peering with fright at the bottom of her cage.

Roaches.  Big F-ing roaches everywhere.  Horror movie roaches.  I screamed.

The bugs were literally crawling out of the woodwork.  Chris raged the war as Frank and I huddled together frozen with fear.  One more roach and we were out of there.  Chris grabbed his pants off the floor, put them on, and a roach crawled out.  I shook out the bedding, grabbed some pillows, put Frank safely in the kitchen, and we made a run for the Volkswagen parked out in the street.

We found solace in a car.

For those concerned, I don’t live in a shit hole. Roach problem is now hopefully under control. Some pipe work had been done and they sprayed for bugs, which made them flee the walls.  Attracted by birdseed, the roaches found haven in Frank’s cage.

Tags: Dirtbagging, Hostels, Motels, Subaru, Weary